Kids Learn Better When Parents React Positively to Failures

Failure is a part of life and we should be ready to accept it. However, in the race to win the “rat race”, people are becoming more and more stressed about success. What is success? Can it be explained without the journey of failures? Thomas Edison said, “I failed my way to success.” Success is a story of failures — that is what we learn from the most accomplished people in history. Failure is a stepping stone towards success, and this fundamental idea needs to be sown in young minds to prepare them for the real world.

How a child sees failure and success depends on the attitude of the parents. What you teach your child at home, and how you behave when they fail at something, decides how they will react to failure. For instance, if your child fails in maths, how can you best deal with it? Even caring parents often say, “It is OK, at least you tried.” But do you know what that implies to a young mind? Children can interpret it as: trying leads to failure.

Instead, ask your child what they learnt from the whole exercise. Ask whether help from a teacher or another adult could be useful, or how they think they can improve in the next exam. It is important for parents to teach children the value of failure — and, more than that, how to accept it. When they fail, teach them to value the failure, not just accept it.

Parents need to make failure constructive for their child. So what can you do? Start by emphasising the journey of learning. Teach your child that failure is simply part of the learning process — in fact, an indispensable part of it. Would Thomas Edison have achieved his fame if he had feared failure? Encourage children to take the process of learning seriously and to accept the results, whatever they may be.

When a child receives such a constructive response to failure, the fear of failing starts to fade. They will not be scared of trying something new, thinking outside the box or going beyond the conventional. And that would be your biggest contribution, as a parent, to your child’s mental development.